Do Gays Need Mace in Macedonia

image from keepcalm-o-matic.co.uk

Ok Act of Gayers, let’s be honest.  How many of you have ever heard of the Republic of Macedonia?  It’s likely that not many of you have.  So, first we’ll start with a little bit of geography and history. Macedonia used to be part of the country called Yugoslavia, until NATO bombed it and split the country into new countries.  None of these countries are known to be particularly nice to gays, but Macedonia has been particularly not nice recently and therefore has earned the ire of Act of Gay.

image from worldatlas.com

Macedonia is currently struggling to be accepted into the European Union. If a country doesn’t seem to be making any effort to be a little bit nice to their gays, why would they want that country in the EU?  Don’t get us wrong, we know that Europe isn’t close to perfect and there are plenty of countries there that haven’t always done the best for their gays, but why add something even more rotten to the stew?

Human Rights Watch has written to the Prime Minister of Macedonia to tell them to start being dear to their queers. After several worrying attacks over pride week in Macedonia with no arrests being made, Boris Dittrich from Human Rights Watch wrote:

“The police have a responsibility to protect all Macedonians, and to investigate all crimes,” Dittrich said. “The prime-minister and the other government ministers should show some political leadership by calling on all Macedonians to halt the anti-LGBTI violence and discrimination.”   “This troubling spate of anti-LGBTI attacks makes it all the more critical for the Macedonian government to take its Council of Europe commitments seriously,” Dittrich said. “The government silence after these attacks, combined with its general disregard for the basic human rights of LGBTI people, contributes to a vicious climate in which hate-filled people believe they can harass and threaten LGBTI rights defenders with impunity.”

Human Rights = Gay Rights

Macedonians are giving the world the impression that they are playground bullies, recently attacking the home of a successful out gay Macedonian actor, Peter Stojkovic, in Macedonia.  But still no action from the police.

image from petarstojkovic.com

As with many of these stories, there are ironic moments.  Completely unpleasant singer, Esma Redzepova, who claims to be a human rights activist, but clearly she is particular about who she considers human, blamed – guess who?  The gays, when her Eurovision entry didn’t make the semi – finals.  Apparently, it was some sort of gay conspiracy that kept her from making it through to the finals. Or, so she claims.

The charming words of this self proclaimed human rights activist were:

“This is an outrage!  Faggots! This event has been taken over by those who run gay pride parades all over the world. I had heard it all before but that was the first time I saw with my own eyes what’s become of this wonderful music competition. No wonder we did not qualify as it is clear who goes there.”

Human Non Rights Stupid Woman

Act of Gay would like to stop at this point and allow you, our loyal Act of Gayers, to watch a video of this woman’s entry.  We would suggest that if there truly were a gay conspiracy, she would have won gold with her woman in drag fabulousness and we do hate to admit she is gay fabulous.  But she is.

Now Macedonia that you have pointed the force of Act of Gay in your directions, we’d like to announce that Serbia no longer wants your tomatoes. So Macedonia, you may need to suck on them.

Stuff Your Tomatoes Macedonia

Even though you may not have a tomato shortage, the rest of your food is going up in cost. If only you had thought about being nice to the gays, maybe you wouldn’t be living on tomato soup now.

Bread’s Now Too Expensive to Eat With Your Soup

And now your women’s under 17 soccer team got thrashed by Switzerland on the same day your thugs tried to burn down the LGBT center.  What a surprise. Can’t imagine that Act of Gay weren’t watching.  Sorry girls, but until you can make out in the shower if you want to after a match without risking bullying in Macedonia, you may not score anywhere else.

Soccer Losers in Macedonia

Macedonia, you better buck up and love your gays. They really are a lovely bunch of people and they may just get you into Europe.

Chile – End Discrimination at ‘the End of the Earth’!

image – Chilean poster translation “And if it is born homosexual? You take away their rights? Law against discrimination now.

Chile is a country of contradictions.  Chileans say that Chile is at ‘the end of the earth’, but does it want to be at the back of the line in terms of protecting its citizens against discrimination.

How could a country that produces this…

image – Mr. Gay Chile contestants 2013 from gaiaespana.com

…be responsible for a constant and frightening source of bad news about queer bashing?  Daniel Zamudio was 24 when he was beaten to death for being gay by a gang of Chilean neo nazis.

Daniel, while still in a coma before he died from his injuries

Daniel Never Forgotten

How could a country, where over 70,000 LGBT people, their loved ones, families and supporters came out on to the streets to support gay pride this year..

image – LGBT Pride Santiago 2013 from gaysportnews.com

…have a young man of 19 waiting for his leg to be amputated right now after he was beaten by a gang of six cowardly men during a gay hate crime?

image – 19 year old Estaban Navarro waiting to lose a leg due to hate

Teen to Become Amputee Due to Hate in Chile

Spokesman Oscar Rementería criticized “the lack of public pronouncements by authorities on this case. Apparently for some solidarity and commitment to non-discrimination is determined by the media impact of a particular event, rather than by the severity of the violations.” He went on to say…

“A young man lost his leg last May, a young transsexual lost an eye and here almost all of the authorities condemned the murder of Daniel Zamudio , have kept absolute silence on the two latter cases, which is unacceptable.”

Do Something!

Chile did indeed pass a hate crime law following the brutal death of Daniel, but it seems that they are doing little to suppress gay bashing across the country and violent crimes against young lgbt people continue.

image – Francisco Aleman Casas, following an attack by Chilean soldiers after leaving gay club 

Attack after Anti Hate Law Introduced by Soldiers

Crimes like these are far too common in Chile and we urge the Chilean government to take the necessary steps to enforce laws introduced to prevent hate crimes and punish those who commit them.

As we know, many blame natural disasters and freaks of nature on ‘the gays’.  Well, Act of Gay, owns that power, absolutely and claims it as our own.  Therefore Chile, think about protecting your beautiful LGBT people or Act of Gay could be sending a wave of gay power your way!  Whoops. Maybe we already did.

 Wouldn’t you Prefer a Wave of Love?

Cardinal Bite Your Tongue!

Last weekend the Dominican Republic held its annual Gay Pride carnival and showed the church exactly what good manners are.  It’s worrying to think that the church educates many children in the Dominican Republic and yet the head of that church, Cardinal Nicolas de Jesus Lopez Rodriguez, thinks that it is appropriate to publicly call the diplomatic representative from another country, a faggot.

Who are You Calling a Faggot – Pot/Kettle We Think

This man, in the gold embossed dress, called James ‘Wally’ Brewster, appointed Ambassador from the USA a maricon (slur meaning faggot in Spanish) during a press conference.  Is this really the sort of man that the church thinks will improve it’s dwindling credibility in the world?  Is this really the sort of representation of civility and maturity that the Dominican Republic wants?

The Dominican Republic has long been a popular destination for gay men.  From the photo above, we’re sure you can see three of the reasons.  Of course there are beautiful beaches and great clubs too.  The gays have a ton of money and they like to spend it, but maybe the gays will wisely take their money somewhere new. Someplace whose priests have more manners and know that the best way to be seen as wise is to think of something stupid and then not to say it.

Ambassador James ‘Wally’ Brewster, we’re sure, will be pleased to know that the local Priest has taken the time to insult him in public and there is no doubt that Act of Gay would like to be a fly on the wall during diplomatic events, where both are likely to be present.

So, Act of Gay would like to challenge this ill mannered Cardinal to a competition.  He can pray the gays away, shout abuse at people in public and we will simply contribute Acts of Gay to the Dominican Republic to remind him of the power of the gay.  As god made all in his image, we would remind him that god may not only be powerful and good, but he’s probably a little bit gay too.

 Image-A participant in Dominican Republic’s Gay Pride 2013 appears to wave at Act of Gay

Act of Gay hates to hit where it hurts, but sometimes it is just necessary.  Your economy is buggered (oh did we say buggered?  Yes buggered, you mean, name calling anti faggots).

Dominican Republic has had the slowest economic growth since 2004.  Now that all the faggots will stop coming to your beaches to spend their money, we suggest you rethink.

Pink Dollar Departure Could Tank You Too

Your horses are giving up the game.  We think they might be gay horses and this is why your horse racing industry has gone belly up.  Think about it.  Big steamy beasts with muscular long legs, breathing heavily with men on their backs.  That sums up your horse racing industry and why Act of Gay might just have this power.

You Did Frighten the Horses

Since your religious leader loves wearing a dress so much, we suggest that the Dominican Republic now takes up racing drag queens instead.

image from genderqueer.tumblr.com

So, Dominican Republic please embrace your gays.  It will make your country a better place and everyone else won’t think you are extremely badly mannered.  Cardinal, we think you might want to pray for a while and consider what the punishment would be in one of your schools for name calling.  A visit to the Priest for a little spanky?  Only problem is that you are the Priest.  Here’s a suggestion for you.

Idaho Has Wear Your Tutu to Work Day!

image from elene-kennedy.tumblr.com

In a perfect world we could all wear tutus to work.  Maybe there should be a wear your tutu to work Friday.  But because of Idaho Republican Cornel Rasor, we may never live in a perfect world. It appears the Mr. Rasor has tutuphobia and he is terrified that should anti discrimination laws be passed in Idaho, men will turn up to work wearing tutus.

Rasor said “I’d hire a gay guy if I thought he was a good worker. But if he comes into work in a tutu … he’s not producing what I want in my office.”

It’s Tutu Much for Equality in Idaho

This complete and utter stupidity has of course inspired an internet meme sensation and as we’d never heard of this Rasnor guy before, we think he has been crowned the tutued fairy queen of stupid.

This level of stupidity tolerated by Idaho politicians must see the wrath of Act of Gay. So, we present to you, not one, but two infestations being brought upon Idaho.  First, let us introduce you to Hoary Cress, which we think might be aptly named, should Mr. Rasnor feel like a ‘hoar’, while secretly dressing in a tutu.  Oh yes, “whip, me beat me, call me a dirty tutu wearing ‘hoar’ ” we can hear him crying.  Hoary cress and other such invasive weeds are costing Idaho tax payers millions.

Eliminate Hoariness by Equalizing Homos

Stupidity on such a grand scale really does require double the infestation, so let us introduce you to the second blight to punish Idaho – The New Zealand Mudsnail, a tiny creature causing unknown havoc.  Slimy and small, they are a menace that can only be eradicated through the elimination of tutuphobia.

Gay Snails Don’t Reproduce.  Think about it Idaho

Hell or High Water in Latin America – We Prefer Rainbows

Image from Gay Travel Belize.com

An Act of Gay reporter has let us know that the power of the gays has been verified by the national news agency of the country of Belize.   After recent flooding and rising rivers, their news reports:

“Greg Figueroa – “This dah di first time. I noh know if dah the UNIBAM brings this flooding yah, I don’t know fi it is the vibes but things change cause I noh see wah flooding like this ever ina mi life.”   The News Verifies the Gays Did It

UNIBAM is a group in the country that is fighting homophobic laws.   As we know, some countries have a fear of anything to do with the anus.  Oh the buggers!  Belize takes this one step further and bans anyone who indulges in a bit of butt play from even entering the country.  So, if you’re visiting Belize, don’t try to slip in through the back door.

Is Belize one huge closet and are they all just screaming for liberation?

The Queer Barrier to Belize

Belize is a country with two hunky shirtless men on it’s flag. It is hot, sweaty and tropical and yet it denies its inner gay spirit.

Act of Gay is very happy to accept responsibility for bringing high water to Belize.  UNIBAM, the country’s group fighting for gay rights,  is far too busy dealing with mean, mean laws to bother with floods – so don’t blame them.  If you’re worried about more floods, be nice to your gays Belize or you’ll have to think about starting to build an Ark and this time, Noah will be a fag and no homophobes will be allowed!

Image by Artist Paul Richmond

Grace University Has No Grace, Decorum or Dignity – according to Act of Gay

We at Act of Gay just want to make sure we’ve heard this correctly.  Grace University, in Omaha, Nebraska expelled a student for being a lesbian?  What century has this University time warped back to?  An institution that should be committed to the education of its students, destroys her academic career and then…..wait for it………they send her a bill for $6,000.

Absolutely No Grace University Charges Lesbian

This is archaic, certainly not part of any sort of education system recognized by Act of Gay as preparing people for the real world, where people have freedom of and freedom from religion – unless of course they live in a theocracy like Iran – but wait a minute.  That seems to be exactly the sort of world that Grace University wants to create.  Let’s look at some of their  stated philosophies and try not to laugh too hard.

“Mankind is morally depraved and is dependent upon and answerable to a holy God.”

“The teacher and student are both significant in the educative process with the Holy Spirit being the chief source of both.”

“The Bible, God’s inerrant, authoritative revelation to man, provides the essence of truth.”

Well that suggests they provide a well rounded education. They made this poor student, who promised not to have sex, attended their ‘counseling’ sessions and the bastards still kicked her out.

So, Nebraska, we hate to do this to you, but the Act of Gay arrow is now pointed straight at you. Please enjoy your droughts and heat bursts, courtesy of the power of the gays – because you know we have that power.

Lesbians Make Nebraska Hot!

Discrimination in Nebraska Means Less Beef

Act of Gay would also like to send this student a huge congratulations for so romantically proposing to her girlfriend at a Macklemore concert, marrying her partner and living happily ever after.  The best way to fight hate is to love well.  Go girls!

Kentucky – Don’t Let Your Senator Make You Kensucky!

Kentucky, the state that begins with a ‘K’ and seems to want to continue to be known by 3 of them!  Act of Gay loves your beautiful countryside and your fabulous horses.  What we really don’t like is your Senator, presidential hopeful, Rand Paul.  Maybe the good folks of Kentucky don’t know it, but he is funded by some nasty assed people.

It seems that the bizarrely named American Family Associaion, classed as a hate group by the Southern Poverty Law Center, are giving Senator Paul financial backing in his bid to run for president of the United States.  Whoa Kentucky!  Hold your horses!

Rand Paul promotes himself as a libertarian so you would think he’d be for the separation of church and state, as would any right thinking American.  Well, the group that seem to be eager to be pulling his financial strings, don’t agree.  So, Kentucky, let’s put this in perspective for you.  This is what the David Lane, one of Rand Paul’s aids and leader of the group that may well have huge influence over your Senator believes.

“Christians must be retrained to war for the Soul of America and quit believing the fabricated whopper of the Separation of Church and State, the lie repeated ad nauseum by the left and liberals to keep Christian America – the moral majority – from imposing moral government on pagan public schools, pagan higher learning and pagan media. “

Don’t Let Crazy Horses Run the Race

Act of Gay calls upon all right thinking Kentuckians to have a word in the ear of Rand Paul and reminds Kentucky what can happen if you really rile up the gays.  Bad weather.  You don’t really want bad weather and if you get it, you don’t want it to be an Act of Gay now do you?

Bad Weather Coming Your Way Kentucky

note from author:  Yes, we know the image at the top is from Georgia, but hey, Georgia, Kentucky – same hate, different state.

Bwahahahaha! Minnesota – Act of Gay is coming to a theater near you!

Could the gays have genetically engineered gay mosquitoes?  If they could, might they be heading towards Minnesota with their best friends the ticks in tow?   We need to investigate.  But of course, Act of Gay does not take investigation seriously and is more inclined to histrionic claims of ‘the sky is falling’, which of course we learned from ‘you know who’.

So Minnesota.  In honor of your very own Rev. Mark Loder and his absolute ‘Lode’ of homophobic crap aimed at little boys,   (Already sounding a bit pervy to us) we present you with a plague, perhaps not of epic proportions, but as we all know – size doesn’t matter.

In one of the most idiotic statements of the week, Loder, from Minnesota (this is a man wankerishly banning the cub scouts from his church in case some of them might be a little bit on the rainbow side) said “I know it will come across that we’re not loving and we don’t want homosexuals around – and that’s not the message that we want conveyed,”

What  ‘Lode’ of Hate Filled Un Christian Non Tax Paying Bullshit

Minnesota, perhaps you should think about opening more loving, inclusive places for Boy Scouts to meet and start taxing people like Loder.  Just a suggestion.

In the meantime, please enjoy a plague of mosquitoes and ticks.

Specially Trained Gay Warrior Tick and Mosquito Plague

Crazy Gay and Fabulous Ants Invade – Lock Up Your Electonics

Image from Innova toys.com

When you think of Texas you think of two things, cowboys and big oil.  When you think of cowboys, you think of one thing….well we do anyway….Brokeback Mountain.  Exxon, the oil company that brought us the most recent oil spill in Mayflower, Arkansas, where an entire community is allegedly suffering ill affects, with 22 families losing their homes and more reporting sickness – is proud to announce that they consider gay people second class citizens.  So, there will not be the Brokeback Oilman sequel.

Sick of Exxon

Well Exxon, you must be so proud of your true, independent Texas spirit, refusing to treat your gay employees like your straight ones.  That’s the spirit.

Exxon Oil Not Lubricating Well for Gays

So, in honor of that crazy Texan spirit,  Act of Gay brings you Crazy Ants.  Oh yes, not just any ol’ ant will do for those crazy Texas oil men. Crazy Ants are known to live in electronic equipment and then destroy it.  A bit like living on a planet and errr destroying it.  Any ants we send your way have to be deeply and truly crazy.  As crazy as this!

God Loves Fags and Ants

Charming and deeply sensitive Exxon CEO, Rex Tillerson, said  “What good is it to save the planet if humanity suffers?”  on Wednesday at their annual meeting.   Well, Rex, Act of Gay suggests that you get on your crazy ant and ride as quickly as possible and stop worrying so much about ..hmmm…let’s see..your employees, the planet…and oh yeah…humanity!

Act of Gay in Outer Space

Image from Wallmay .net

Birds do it, bees do it, even Ecuadorans do it….  Yes, we’re talking about love.  Apparently though it’s not part of ‘nature’ for gay Ecuadorans to do it.  It’s interesting that gay Ecuadorans are so much different from the rest of us natural gays.  Well, this is the case according to the Ecuadoran President, who has stated his opposition to both gay marriage and gay adoption.

Are Gay Ecuadorans from Outer Space?

You would think that a President would be a bit better informed, because if he were, he’d know that the most up to date research shows that children who have same sex parents are healthier and their families are closer.  I suppose the President of Ecuador doesn’t want Ecuadoran children to be healthier and have closer relationships with their parents.  That would be the only explanation we can see.

We Might Not Breed Them, But we Raise ’em Better

So, Act of Gay, in a far out demonstration of space power has to announce that Ecuador’s only satellite, with the immensely heterosexual name ‘Pegasus’, is now spinning wildly through space like a whirling dervish.

We also wouldn’t want to comment on the fact that Pegasus is only 4 inches in length.  We have no doubt that if the satellite had been built by gay engineers, it would have been longer and girthier and been able to withstand a bombardment of ‘space particles’.  Could this be an Act of Gay?  We urge Ecuador to get their President to read a bit more and get better informed and hire some gay engineers for their space program.

Ecuador Sends Heterosexual 4 inches Into Space – Space Not Impressed